S. met me for lunch today - to give me a big bag of toys for the puppy my family is getting tomorrow (big day!).
They are all new(ish) toys that Her dog isn't using because he plays only with his favorites. Classic, thoughtful S.
We/we then went out to coffee, and after that She directed Us/us to my office were i massaged Her feet and We/we talked for a bit.
She asked me how i was doing with the masturbation restriction and i let her know it was hard at times. i would otherwise be masturbating 2-3 times a day most days. but i also told her that i wanted to learn to redirect and use the energy/tension that was being created by the daily denial.
i know it's crazy to say it is "hard" to "only" masturbate once a day, but there it is. i know that many others whose cocks are also controlled go much longer, insanely long. and i could see how going without for a long while could actually be better but ONLY after becoming "acclimated" to the reality. Being allowed to cum once a day means i spend the whole day looking forward to it, building tension. however, the "getting acclimated" part could be even worse...
She questioned me further asking specifically if it was disrupting my life/work. And i had to answer no. If She wasn't controlling my cock i would easily be spending an hour or two masturbating on most days. So, even allowing for negative impact of the tension, i really can't say it's a disruption in my life. And if i learned to redirect the energy, i would actually be much better off altogether.
Anyhoo, after hearing all this, She told me the contract would continue to continue. And that as a reward for massaging Her feet this afternoon, i would be allowed to jerk off and cum early tomorrow morning (in addition to my regular evening opportunity)!
Besides redirecting the tension as energy into other things (like frequent blogging!), i want to learn how to better translate the tension/frustration as an expression of Her control. When i consciously think of the frustration that way, the experience changes and i feel much better (and Her cock gets hard). So i think the more i practice that conscious re-orientation, the more it can become an automatic unconscious orientation.
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